Jennifer Toffoli
Enough
This piece was inspired by a very personal journey towards my own breakthrough. It is shocking how quickly we can lose our way in the darkness. When familiar landmarks change and those truths we once clung to so faithfully suddenly disappear. The concept for this piece first came to me at a time when I seriously doubted whether I would ever draw again. I had allowed the noise and chaos to hold me down and rob me of the joy art once brought me. Doubt replaced passion and fear replaced creativity; while my need to draw never waivered, my belief in myself and my talents did. A breakthrough typically occurs at the end of an arduous journey full of strife and struggle. It reveals itself gradually, like a puzzle made of fog; always moving and changing, never quite coming together - until it finally does. When the truth finally reveals itself, it might only be for a brief moment - but it is profound. Once it has been seen, it can never be unseen. The idea for this piece came to me in a moment of clarity where I allowed myself to admit what I truly wanted. When I removed myself from the noise of the world around me, the constant opinions of others, the competitiveness, the expectations, the obligations - I was finally able to see how little it all matters.
To recognize that my love of drawing and my need for drawing was enough of a reason to do it. That I was enough to do it. That the simple act of putting pen to paper again - was enough.
Enough.
Enough
A personal journey to rediscover truths that have been forgotten.
A companion prose piece in support of the visual art item "Enough".
Enough by Jennifer Toffoli
Imagine fighting your way up the side of a steep mountain; every step a struggle, every breath a fight. You are bombarded with noise, chaos and negativity. With every step, the ground beneath you becomes slightly less sure. You are terrified that it will not support your weight. You look back and there is no one there to catch you. You look down and there is only the chance to fall. But you keep going. You keep climbing. You keep going despite every fibre of your body begging you to stop; willing you to go back down.
You fight through it all. You are almost destroyed. You just keep going.
Then suddenly, when you have almost nothing left to give, you see it over the next rise.
Your salvation. Your truth. Your freedom.
You reach the peak and you are free. Free from self-doubt. Free from cruelty. Free from negativity and noise. Free from shame. Free from guilt. Free from everything you’ve ever feared might be true.
You stand in the open air and breathe so deeply that it is as if you have never breathed before.
You are beautiful. You are brave. You are miraculous and you are whole.
You are enough.
And even though you know that you cannot stay, that you must go back down and face it all again, you know that you are strong enough to face it. Because you have seen the truth. You have seen yourself. And even if it was only for a single, fleeting moment of perfect clarity and understanding – you will carry that truth with you for the rest of your life because it has awoken your soul and healed your heart.
You were never broken, but you have broken through.
You are enough.
About Jennifer Toffoli
Jennifer Toffoli is a self-trained “doodler-extraordinaire.” Often wavering between quietly quirky and deliciously dark, her work blends elements of abstract and pop-art to create a style that is uniquely her own. An avid reader and music lover, Jennifer draws much of her inspiration from the books and lyrics she adores. Believing that it is better to be peculiar than perfect, Jennifer aims to add a bit of whimsy to the everyday. Her work has previously been published by the University of Toronto and the Scarborough Arts Council and displayed at the Graven Feather, Papermill and Bluffs galleries in Toronto.